Sunshine & Sunflowers

Highly Flawed, is Change Possible?

Wed, 19 Jun 2013 02:04:41 -0700

I tend to misinterpret a lot and sometimes blame others for my life circumstances. In reality, I’m the one who has control over my life, so any mistakes I make, I must pay for the consequences.

I’ve been selfish without realizing it and have been treated like a princess—a princess that I am not. I have been given so many luxuries and privileges and had a really good future set out for me by my parents, but I have been choosing the wrong path, probably damaging a future that could have been bright. Perhaps I’ll be able to turn my life around, build bridges, and hope that everything will work out in the end.

I keep pushing my loved ones further away and making things more complex than they really need to be.

I know my “voice” has very little merit, but if it means anything, I’m sorry. I’ve messed up, big time, and I’m pretty sure a lot of people dislike/hate/are disappointed in me.

I’m already 23 and I haven’t really accomplished much, but I have faith that I will get somewhere. I stayed on the sidelines and didn’t know what my plans were, but it’s a learning process. I’m not going to put myself down this time, but understand that we all make mistakes and continual action is necessary.

My need for self-confidence turned into a well of conceit and I bet a lot of people probably can’t stand me…

Note to self: Less talk. More DO!

Soul sisters fo sho yo lol

Sun, 16 Jun 2013 19:53:01 -0700

Seriously, I was with Del when she found out she made Hollywood Klowns and I was super happy for her! I was like Uhhh She sooo would. Haha Nowhere near jealous!

Del: “Umm wtf. I can’t message them. Their mailbox is that full.”

She was super excited! Haha I know the natural feeling of being super happy, despite life circumstances :)

It was father’s day when my daddy had to help me out. Thanks pops, thanks, I love you :)

Happy Father's Day!!!

Sun, 16 Jun 2013 18:26:00 -0700

Feliz Padre’s Dia! lol

I thought I’d take a picture of them while they were sleeping because I thought it was super cute hehehe

They’re going to the the North County fair today. I was going to go with them after work, but they need their time together :)

Thanks pops for saving my ass after that time I was near East Vista way -____-, and the time when I ruined the hub caps on the car and you had to drive to Shedel’s apartment Father’s Day morning to check the car out

-____-

and for giving birth to me, and for giving me your genetics, and you’re fucking hilarious!!!! Namaste Padre <3

Of course, I love you pops! lol (lots of love is what my mom says )

Micael MP and Kyle T are homies who also had Dr. Jeff Ihara

Sat, 15 Jun 2013 18:28:34 -0700

I hung out with my little brother las night <3 Micael MP who was my lab partner in Physiology (and Physics Spring 2012) and he’s just the sweetest thing, and I got his back, I got his back ;)

We were talking about school, and it reminded me of how annoyed I got when these two students were mad hating on Dr. Jeff Ihara. I think I mentioned some of this before.

Girl: “Really? You’re like the first person I know who likes him.”

Really? All the cool people I know who took him, like him…

She said she thinks he has a speech impediment.

I wanted to say,

“Oh, well I doubt that. He’s just super intelligent

that he’s busy trying to figure out what words to use

to communicate to lesser intelligence levels.”

I didn’t want to sound harsh, but it’s truth. He thinks on a more advanced level in comparison to certain types of MiraCosta students.

I, personally, found Bio 202 super intriguing. I just had trouble studying because I started day dreaming too much haha and went a lil downhill.

I seriously would have gotten an A if I didn’t miss taking some of the quizzes and gave up trying.

Why?

I lost my marbles when I saw him at Joey’s 21st birthday. LMAO my homies supported me and held me up while I did that hand stand ;) in a long dress. Thanks for looking out loves :)

Joey’s birthday was after the pin up girl photoshoot.

“Umm, I’ve never really done this before…What do I do? Fuck, umm I guess I’ll just laugh and smile. I don’t know how to do sexy haha.”

Cheer up World! Let's learn to trust that there's good in the world

Sat, 15 Jun 2013 18:02:14 -0700

I hope I’m not too trusting of people. I do my best to respect and be honest to others so I would appreciate it mirrored back to me. Who knows…I hope people won’t work against me, but they will work with me to make this world a better place. I love this Universe so much. Life is a gift. Treasure every moment. Smile more, because life is grand and beautiful!

thefitunited: Wake up. Kick Ass. Repeat One and only way, to...

Sat, 15 Jun 2013 17:35:03 -0700

thefitunited:

Wake up. Kick Ass. Repeat

One and only way, to be real.

Photo

Sat, 15 Jun 2013 17:19:18 -0700

Photo

Sat, 15 Jun 2013 03:13:11 -0700

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=C6gqCZl90G8 Ranier is pretty...

Fri, 14 Jun 2013 10:49:58 -0700

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=C6gqCZl90G8

Ranier is pretty badass, to be real.

Rest in love Alex. I’ll never forget you. Damn, life is...

Fri, 14 Jun 2013 10:39:33 -0700

Rest in love Alex. I’ll never forget you.

Damn, life is hardcore.

Sign in to Twitter

Fri, 14 Jun 2013 10:26:36 -0700

I forgot I signed up for one of these. Maybe I’ll utilize this tool.

@SvetlannaJoan

LMFAO!!!!! I’M DYING OUT OF LAUGHTER RIGHT NOW...

Fri, 14 Jun 2013 09:15:27 -0700

LMFAO!!!!! I’M DYING OUT OF LAUGHTER RIGHT NOW HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAAHAH

I don’t remember creating a Svetlanna youtube account, but oh well. hahah

Hell yes, I bought a watch!

Fri, 14 Jun 2013 09:05:19 -0700

Good thing, because I momentarily misplaced my phone. I can still go on about my day, thanks to my handy dandy notebook lol

Life is grandular. I made that word up too.

Awwwww, that just made my heart smile :) Haha I like the mellow...

Thu, 13 Jun 2013 11:03:43 -0700

Awwwww, that just made my heart smile :)

Haha I like the mellow yellow lighter too

"No, you shouldn't bus tables. You belong in the front."

Thu, 13 Jun 2013 10:59:38 -0700

Last night, a guest was leaving and I said, “hey, nice beard.”

He started laughing so I started laughing haha

I love working at Ruby’s now. I just need to rely on my homegirls at work to keep the hope alive haha. “Cherry or no cherry?” haha I love working with Viri and Heidi!

Anyway, I need a way to make stable tips, so I tried asking my previous manager if I could be a busser. I am really strong and I like working hard if it’s worth it. I’ve been told I have charisma, but I need the fucking money hahahahahhha no worries no worries, I got this shit handled.

Friday I’m fully off from school and work. Thaaaaaannk goodness I can fucking chill hard and get shit done. hell yea

"Dude, Seriously though? These are old fotografias…They look super sexy now. Well, you know,..."

Wed, 12 Jun 2013 09:21:27 -0700

“Dude, Seriously though? These are old fotografias…They look super sexy now. Well, you know, that’s my opinion. <3 my brothers from other mothers lol kisses and hugs my loves :)”

- SJMV

My Ex hahahahahahahahahahah

Wed, 12 Jun 2013 09:17:16 -0700

Dude I’m dying laughing right now because I just had a silly ass conversation with Travis. He’s getting so upset at me!

“You’re not the same Svetlanna that I used to know.”

“Thank goodness!”

“No, you’re hurting my feelings.”

SHIT really? Dude not intentional! I am just glad to be me, and if you have a problem with that, this phone call should end soon

He hangs up… Of course. Without even saying a “bye” or “i love you’ sigh, deal breaker! haha I know, super high standards.

I wanted to rip his clothes off when he picked me up from work the other day, with his tattoos peeping out of his uniform…but I was like naw, not worth losing the one.

“I’m sorry, Travis, I know you hate hearing this but I love you, although, I’m not in love with you.”

Fuck off. hahahaha jk. I don’t need his attorney. I don’t need him to rescue me. He’s not my hero. I projected that he used me for sex…I used him for sex but it was just aight. Then it got crazy near the end. Actually really crazy that one time. I was like fuck this is really weird as fuck but I’m down as long as I could breathe haha.

I did the best I could with the little hours I worked since I devoted my energy toward, school, work, and lying next to him like a fucking zombie. Instead of using that time to work more hours, I spent my waking life caged in his room because I told my parents “We’re helping each other recover.” He made me a playlist and I was fucking bawling cuz I hurt him so bad and I didn’t realize how much damage it would cause another human being. He’s back to his downward spiral but I’m not responsible. What I did, may have been a trigger. Fuck. So unintentional. Damn, I care about Travis so much, but shit, too much for me to handle. He needs to handle his own shit.

He’s still a sweetie though. He’s making progress. Well I don’t know. The one that got away… damn he fucking bent over backwards for her. SUPER GNAR… totally loves her.

SERIOUSLY? AWWWWW SOOOOOOO SWEEET <333333 He’s such a...

Wed, 12 Jun 2013 08:50:00 -0700

SERIOUSLY? AWWWWW SOOOOOOO SWEEET <333333

He’s such a sweetheart! He was my first kiss! And first guy to touch my breasts. hahahhahahah damn, good times ;)

He was always so handsome to me :) Don’t worry yo, I got your back, I got you, I got you. You’re option tres lol :)

He definitely went through a metamorphosis on the outside and is like hotdamnnnnn hahahahha Aw he’s so handsome :)

“Dylan, man I’m so sorry!”

“Svet, don’t worry about it, you’re fine.”

We care about each other, for sure :)

Brother from another mother

Dude, SUPER fucking funny!!!!!!!

Wed, 12 Jun 2013 08:42:03 -0700

My homegirl, Viri (she’s 20 years, just saying homies; she likes white men. Yo tambien… Me gusta un gringo wink wink, me gusta mi clase de Espanol. Anyway…She’s having scandalous men fight for her. DUDE SHE’S SUPER HARDCORE HAHAHAHAHAHA FUCKING HILARIOUS SHIT ), she’ll be playing video games with this boy she met when she was younger. He has a girlfriend. 7/7 for the homies and homegirls :)

anyway! HAHA!!!

Me: “DUDE YOU KNOW WHAT’S SO FUNNY?”

Viri: “Hmm?”

Me: “THE FUCKING FUNNY ASS SHIT THAT HATERS SAY AND DO!!!!!!!!!! LMFAO!!!!!!! But wow, hmmm they’re pretty creative at painting that perception of me”

Like seriously? WTF are you trying to say? Are you troubled? Don’t worry, yoga set me free <3

I’m seriously laughing out loud because I’m like, um what kind of a fucking question is that? Haha it’s chill, it’s chill. I just make weird fucking faces since I have nothing else to say.

I’m just being me :)

Love yourself, love the world <3

Mi familia let me have my Mac so I’m posting mad memories...

Wed, 12 Jun 2013 08:25:00 -0700

pearl necklace (lol)

Birth of Royal L. mhmmm :)

BROOKE IS SOOOOO HILARIOUS. She cracks me the fuck up!!! HAHA ALI JAYNE as well!!! HAHAHA Congrats from graduating from San Jo State

Mi familia let me have my Mac so I’m posting mad memories like madly right now haha yeaaa family goes beyond the nuclear family.

This was the birth of Royal Liquor. Lupe and Salina and Erika and Steven driving the egg (The previa? It looked like a giant egg to me haha).

I’m so glad that she’s vibrant and alive and naturally beautiful!

—————————————-

She told me

“That’s random.”

Naw, lol.

“Oh well, no it’s not. We all know each other and are friends.”

Exactly. Chill, just chill the fuck out!! Haha I am, I am, no worries yo, no worries. hahahaha I hear an echo. Trina said, “after svet says something at least twice, we repeat it twice after her.” LMAO

Need to vaporize to you know, clear the sinuses of course. I can’t wait until I can start training again. SUPER STOKED!! No pain, no gain :)